q. Can I get Plastic headlines via instant messenger? (updated 20 april 2004)
Plastic headlines via instant messenger has been mothballed for awhile now - no deadline's been set for finishing up the new code - but the dictionary, spellcheck, and other services are now once again available, this time with all major messenging formats supported. On AIM, instant message 'askplastic'; for Yahoo Messenger, use 'askplastic'; via MSN Messenger, im 'askplastic@plastic.com'; ICQ users can search for 'askplastic@plastic.com' or send an initial message directly to '306082698'. Send 'help' for a short list of available commands.

q. I want to talk to someone about my problem right now. (added 26 july 2002)

1. Getting Started
Registration
q. Why become a registered member of Plastic? (added 1 july 2002)
Your User Info page
Changing your password/Adding member info
Customizing your view of Plastic's comment threads
q. How do members earn karma? (updated 1 august 2002)

2. Stories
Reading stories
Submitting stories
q. Should I submit a story in anticipation of a future event? (added 14 may 2002)
q. Why does Plastic seem to favor U.S. issues and interests? (added 19 june 2002)
q. I've gotten feedback via the submission queue that I'd like to respond to - how do I make changes to writeups I've already submitted? (tk)
Topic-specific sections
Sidebars

3. Comments
Reading comments
Posting comments
Filtering comments
Blocking users
q. Who's this guy 'Anonymous Idiot'? He must spend a lot of time posting comments, and he's often rude, inconsiderate, or downright insulting. (added 10 may 2002)

4. Moderation (updated 4 june 2002)
q. What's moderation?
q. How does moderation work?
q. Why moderate at all?
q. How are moderators chosen? (updated 28 april 2002)
q. Can I both comment and moderate within the same discussion? (added 7 may 2002)

5. Other Issues
q. Are there RSS-format XML files for Plastic? Where are they found? (added 28 april 2002)
q. What's this about a Plastic real-time chat? (added 14 may 2002)
q. Where's the obligatory list o' links? (updated 1 july 2002)
q. When did Plastic launch? (added 11 november 2002)
q. I found a bug. How do I report it? (added 2 june 2002)
q. How do I make a feature request? (updated 27 june 2002)
q. How do I get my very own '@plastic.com' email address, and webmail to go with it? (added 30 july 2002)
q. What if I'd rather make a donation to keep Plastic running? (updated 17 july 2002)

6. Contact Info
q. And all this is an elaborate joke on the part of whom? (added 28 april 2002)
q. What's the mailing address for Plastic? (added 30 july 2002)
q. So what sort of sacrifice should I make at the altar of the Great Omnipotent Plastic Ruler Carl? (added 16 july 2002)

8. Various Non-issues
q. What's a good introduction to the Lacanian analysis of popular culture? (added 13 july 2002)
q. Lacan makes my head hurt. (added 13 july 2002)
q. Where can I get a decent bagel? (added 17 july 2002)
q. What can you tell me about the "Fakes..." spam from Ryan and Jacob? (added 29 june 2002)
q. Where can I find the cutest dog in the universe? (added 5 july 2002)
q. I meant actual cute. (added 9 july 2002)
q. Do you know of a good source for devil duckies? (added 5 july 2002)
q. These cheap clown shoes are killing me. Makes you wonder whether child labor is all that good a value. Where can I get high-quality clown shoes, featuring the shoe-within-a-shoe? (added 14 july 2002)
q. Whatever became of Sarah Records? (added 3 august 2002)
q. Tater? Tomater? (added 2 november 2002)
q. She wants to get married, but I'm not sure. (added 8 july 2002)
q. He proposed, but he can be a bit of a jerk. (added 8 july 2002)

q. I want to talk to someone about my problem right now. (added 1 august 2002)
Click this link - yes, this one, right here - to load the IRC Java client in your web browser. If it's the first time you've run the software, you will have to give it a minute or two while it loads and initializes. It'll go much faster if you don't sit there and stare at it. Trust me. Once the software is running, you can ask questions of - and get immediate feedback from - other Plastic members (including an editor or two), some of whom may actually be helpful. And often you'll get better answers than the ones I can give you - after all, they were once as mystified by this whole "Plastic" thing as you are. Some still are.

Registration
To get the most out Plastic, you'll need to get registered. Get started by submitting your real name or preferred username and your email address. Plastic will then email you a password that will allow you to log in and customize your view of the Plastic homepage and user comments.

q. Why become a registered member of Plastic? (added 1 july 2002)
Once you're a registered Plastic member, you can customize your views, personalize your sidebars (including creating your own links to sites that matter to you, or getting rid of the sidebars altogether, leaving more screen real estate for comments), rate other members' comments, submit writeups for possible discussion, see pending submissions via the queue, search the full text of discussions - writeups and comments - both present and past, send Plastic messages, make Plastic pals, block other users, and, most importantly, post a comment as someone other than 'Anonymous Idiot.'

Your User Info page
Once you receive your temporary password, you can log in, after which you will be automatically returned to the Plastic homepage. Click on your username at the top of the main Story Well to go to your User Info page, where you can change your user preferences. Use the links at the top of the User Info page to add additional information about yourself, change your password, or customize your view of Plastic's homepage and discussions.

Changing your password/Adding user info
Click the Edit User Info link at the top of your User Info page to provide information about yourself to other Plastic members. Feel free to include as much or as little as you wish.

Customizing your view of Plastic's comment threads
Click the Customize Comments link at the top of your User Info page to personalize how Plastic displays user comments. You can change the threshold of your comment filter to increase or decrease the number of comments you see based on how they have been moderated by other Plastic members. You can also adjust the way comments display and the way they are sorted.

q. How do members earn karma? (updated 1 august 2002)
a. New members start out with a karma of 1 for registering with Plastic. Thereafter, members primarily earn karma by posting comments which are moderated up by other members (that is, for comments with a score of 1.5 or higher); by submitting writeups for discussions that are accepted for publication; and, once you have the ability to vote in the submission queue, by making suggestions and corrections which prove helpful in preparing writeups for publication. Karma is also awarded for standout comments which are excerpted in the "About Plastic" box on the front page; and for helping improve Plastic - such as writing questions with answers for inclusion in this FAQ.

Reading stories
Story summaries on Plastic's home page and Section pages are designed to be short, catchy, and to the point. In many cases, though, there's more to read than we can fit on our main pages. And there's always more to say. The "Read comments" link sends you to the unique page for each story, where the full text of each story can be found and all the reader comments can be browsed. If you're only interested in reading about a particular category of news, use the navigation bar on the left-hand side of every Plastic page to read stories from specific Sections (such as Games, Politics, or Television.) Click on the Plastic logo any time you want to return to the homepage.

Submitting stories
As with election-day voting in Al Capone's Chicago, you should submit stories for posting at Plastic early and often. Click the Suggest Story button on the left-hand side of any Plastic page, then use the pull-down menu to indicate the specific section in which you think the story should appear. Always include a subject line that clearly explains the subject of the story you're submitting, and don't forget to include the URL. As much as possible, please also try to make sure we haven't already posted something on the same subject.

q. Should I submit a story in anticipation of a future event? (added 14 may 2002)
a. Generally, you'll want to wait until an actual event has taken place. Otherwise any discussion tends to involve blind speculation. Yes, those pesky 'facts' can sometimes cramp the best of '-1 obnoxious' tirades, but chances are you won't let that stop you. (Courtesy 'mischief.')

q. Why does Plastic seem to favor U.S. issues and interests? (added 19 june 2002)
a. Plastic's editors represent four or five countries - depending upon if you count Canada - and three continents. If you feel that the discussions on Plastic are U.S.-centric, you might try submitting writeups on the events and issues you'd like to see on Plastic. The editors can't run what hasn't been submitted.

Sections
You know, "Sections." So Plastic can be something more than one gigantic "You put your chocolate in my peanut butter/You put your peanut butter in my chocolate..."

Sidebars
In the right-hand column of Plastic's homepage and section pages, you'll see content modules we call sidebars. Plastic's sidebars cull the latest headlines and items from the best sites online, and we're always adding new ones.

Reading comments
Plastic is designed to let any reader comment on any story at any time. That's why every story posted on Plastic's homepage or Section pages is linked to a reader comments page. Just click the "Read comments" link at the bottom of any story to go to the unique page for that story and its related discussion.

Posting comments
To post a comment about a story you've read about on Plastic, click on the "comment on story" link found below the story's writeup. It's also possible to reply to another member's comment specifically by selecting the "reply to comment" link, which you'll find next to yet another "comment on story" link, beneath each comment. (You might also consider sending a private message to the author of the comment, if your reply wouldn't really add to the discussion.)

You'll first preview a comment before you submit it for posting on Plastic. When previewed, possible misspellings will be highlighted yellow. Users of compatible browsers can see a quick list of suggestions by mousing over highlighted words. Do note that Plastic's spellcheck is not yet comprehensive (especially when it comes to all those new 'hip,' 'jive' expressions), and never intends to offend you. (Thanks to 'Peter Murphy' for providing an extensive list of proper nouns, alternative spellings, and Plastic-specific jargon for inclusion in the spelserver's word list.)

Your comment will also be rated on the Flesch scale of reading ease - a score from 0 to 100 will be assigned, with 100 being a Dick-and-Jane-level composition. The rating uses a simple formula based on sentence length and word length developed by Dr. Rudolf Flesch in the 1940s. As you likely assume, the Flesch score is fairly meaningless outside of context, which is why Plastic compares your comment's score with scores from samples from well-known publications, such as Time and Seventeen magazines. As with the spellcheck, the Flesch rating is simply a convenience, to be used or ignored however you please, and is discarded as soon as you submit your comment for posting on Plastic.

Filtering comments
Registered members can filter comments posted at Plastic by adjusting the settings on their Customize Comments page. To see fewer, more highly-rated comments, set your comment filter higher; if you'd rather read most everything, set your filter to 0.

You can also adjust the way filtered comments display and the way they are sorted: "Condensed" view will show you the full text to all the comments above your filter threshold, with replies to those comments displayed only as headlines until you click to expand them. "Expanded" view will show the full text of all the comments and replies above your filter threshold, with replies indented.

Blocking users
If a particular individual is raining on your Plastic parade, you have the ability to filter out, or block, the user entirely. Doing so will not only block the display of all comments by that user, but also discard future messages from and moderations by the blocked user. To block, follow any linked member name to that member's personal Plastic page, then click on the 'block' option near the top of that page. And if you think Plastic would be a better place were it not to allow anonymous posting, you can choose to block the display of all comments by the 'Anonymous Idiot,' as well - select 'preferences,' then 'blocked users,' then 'block the Anonymous Idiot.'

q. Who's this guy 'Anonymous Idiot'? He must spend a lot of time posting comments, and he's often rude, inconsiderate, or downright insulting. (added 10 may 2002)
a. preferences / block users / block the Anonymous Idiot.

Moderation (updated, but not yet brought up-to-date, 28 april 2002)
Plastic's members can filter the comments that make up every discussion based on ratings, or scores, awarded to them by members like you. The process of assigning points to comments is called "moderation."

What's moderation?
Moderation is the effort to reduce unessential or out-of-place information. Moderators are, in general, a lot like editors - their job is to keep things on-track and on-topic by highlighting the useful, filtering out the useless.

Moderation of one kind or another is ubiquitous in the information we get every day. Few newspapers and magazines, for example, publish every letter they receive. Radio stations don't play every song request or broadcast every crank call. Usenet discussion groups are often moderated to cull the best contributions, keep discussions on topic, and filter out spam and flame-bait. In all these cases, editors or managers decide what should be published or broadcast and what shouldn't.

How does moderation work on Plastic?
On Plastic, moderation isn't something determined by a select few and delivered from on high to the rest of us, take-it-or-leave-it. Instead, all Plastic members have the potential to be moderators - to decide what's great and what's less-than-great - and everyone is empowered to share the fruits of these collective decisions.

A simple two-part process makes this possible:

Rating: Based on their relevance, intelligence, and originality, comments at Plastic can be moderated, or "modded," up or down, using a numerical scale from -1 (and below, in the case of anonymous "contributions") to +5. Comments by unregistered visitors (our very own "Anonymous Idiot") are posted to discussions with an initial rating of 0; comments posted by members start with a score of +1. Moderators then moderate comments up or down (by the half-point). If two fistfuls of moderators think a comment is brilliant, it may end up with a +5; useless comments are generally moderated down to -1. Truly obnoxious anonymous comments (and only anonymous comments) can be moderated down even further - once these comments drop below a score of -2, they're no longer displayed unless specifically requested.

Filtering: Whether they've been moderated or not, comments on Plastic can be filtered by registered members based on the preferences they select on their Customize Filters page. By setting their filter thresholds between 0 and +5, Plastic members modify the site to fit their needs - from preferring to see only the most exceptional comments (+2) to an obsessive-compulsive desire to read most everything (0).

Why moderate at all?
Plastic is designed to handle many more comments each day than any one user should really have time to read. Without moderation, you'd be so busy trying to keep up that you might not take the time to think before you post, to the detriment of us all. From time to time, then, Plastic will ask for your help to sift out the junk and pan for genius. Consider it your opportunity to make Plastic better.

q. How are moderators chosen? (updated 28 may 2002)
a. Twice daily, a lottery is conducted to randomly distribute moderation points to members who read and comment at Plastic often enough to indicate an understanding of the basic rules of the Plastic community. Also factored in is your 'karma,' a number that indicates how other moderators have rated your comments in the past. In short, we look for moderators who are consistent, involved, and well-regarded by their peers.

In practice, you're most likely to be entrusted with mod points if you log in every time you visit Plastic.

q. The member name I want is already taken, but it's not being used. Can I have it? (added 28 april 2002)
a. In some cases yes, it's possible to be assigned an account that's already been registered. There are some important qualifications, though: First, the account in question can't have any posted comments associated with it. You can check by going to the member page for the name in question - if no comments are listed, I believe that currently indicates none exist for the account whatsoever. The account must also have been dormant for at least the last six months; check the date last visited, also shown on the member page.

If there's no associated comments and the account hasn't been in recent use, you may be in luck. Before going any further, though, you'll need to open a new Plastic account - if you're reading this, chances are you already have - and collect enough karma in the usual way (posting and submitting stories) to cover the +5 point fee to complete the process. The karmic charge is for my time, and is deducted from your account regardless of the final disposition of the member name.

I'll then do a full search of the comment and story archives to ensure nothing's been posted from the account, and send a courtesy email to the address registered with the account, outlining this procedure - though in most cases, I suspect, the mail will bounce. If the tests are met, the account is then yours; your current member name will be replaced throughout Plastic with your new name; you'll otherwise keep your current preferences, total karma, published stories and comments, saved messages, and all other personal data. A small note will be added to your personal Plastic page, noting your previous member name and the date of the change.

Currently this takes forever for me to get around to. Just so you know.

q. Are there XML files for Plastic? Where are they found? (added 28 april 2002)
a. Yes, Plastic writes out XML in various formats for all your news aggregation needs.

• This is the main headlines summary file, detailing the ten most recent stories running on Plastic. Everything published on Plastic cycles through this listing:
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/recentstories.xml>
  
  
• Also available are the ten most active discussions - those stories published within the last three days with the greatest number of comments, in RDF format:
  • <http://www.plastic.com/rdf/activediscussions.rdf>
  
  
• For a more idiosyncratic view of Plastic, there's the ten most highly rated comments of those posted in the past 24 hours via RDF:
  • <http://www.plastic.com/rdf/top10comments.rdf>
  
  
• There's Slash-style XML files for each of Plastic's sections; these list the ten most recent stories for the category. (I'll shortly convert these to the more common RSS format):
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/etcetera.xml>
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/filmtv.xml>
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/games.xml>
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/media.xml>
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/music.xml>
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/politics.xml>
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/scitech.xml>
  • <http://www.plastic.com/xml/work.xml>

q. What's this about a Plastic real-time chat? (added 5 june 2002)
a. If you've got an IRC client, you can connect to irc://chat.plastic.com, port 6667, and join channel #plastic. (The service is also available on port 56667, if 6667 happens to be blocked on your network.) For those interested in a Plastic-oriented chat but are new to IRC, first a small warning: IRC can be downright confusing to the uninitiated. Then again, if you've managed to find your way around Plastic's website, you shouldn't have too much trouble connecting to a chat room. There's an embedded Java client at http://chat.plastic.com/ which might do you for a quick visit; it seems to work well for most Internet Explorer and Netscape/Mozilla users. Windows users might try the freeware Trillian, a skinable client that supports AIM, ICQ, MSN, and Yahoo! messaging along with IRC. There's also the shareware mIRC, the most popular IRC client for Windows. Mac users might try shareware Ircle if they're running System 9 or earlier; OS X users often prefer Snak, which is also shareware. The open source XChat is an IRC client for X, RPMs and binaries are available for most every Linux variant, as well as FreeBSD and others. The Amiga - sure to make a comeback any day now - has AmIRC. Mozilla user, an IRC client, Chatzilla, is part of most default installations. (Thanks to 'ds-x,' who's helped shepherd and support Plastic IRC.)

q. Where's the obligatory list o' links? (updated 1 july 2002)
a. If I only had the time, what Plastic would be. In the meantime, if you link to Plastic, it links to you. Or something like that.

q. When did Plastic launch? (added 11 november 2002)
a. After over a year in incubation, Plastic launched under the auspices of Automatic Media 15 January 2001. Six months later, in June of 2001, Automatic Media shutters its doors; Carl begins negotiations to buy Plastic. Once two magazine publishers and a gaming network drop out of the running, the deal is successfully completed on 1 December 2001. On 15 January 2002, Plastic celebrated its first anniversary.

q. I found a bug. How do I report it? (added 2 june 2002)
a. Send bug reports to carl@plastic.com. The submission queue is not the appropriate place to file bug reports - there's a good chance I'll never see your notice, and you'll annoy those members reading the queue in the process.

I tend not to respond to bug reports until I've had time to research the problem. Also, I depend upon multiple bug reports to diagnose and prioritize problems, so please, feel free. I'd much rather get multiple bug reports - especially from the knowledgeable sort of person who assumes I must already know - than get no reports at all. If you fear you may be wasting your time, keep it short; I'll get back to you if I have questions.

q. How do I make a feature request? (updated 27 june 2002)
a. Plastic is by no means complete. Select "preferences / update my info"; there you'll find a suggestion box of your very own. You'll be sharing your ideas for making Plastic better not just with me, but with all of Plastic, since what you write there will be displayed as part of your member page. Be persuasive enough to have others make the same request, and it becomes that much more likely your feature will find its way onto my list of future additions. If you're interested, you can view all member feature requests on a single page, though I threw that together primarily for my benefit...

q. How do I get my very own '@plastic.com' email address, and webmail to go with it? (added 30 july 2002)
a. Plastic members with positive karma can subscribe to Plasticmail for US$36 / 1 year, via Paypal, Amazon, or by check or money order. Plasticmail is both full-featured webmail, and POP3- and SMTP-based mail, for when you'd rather use Outlook or Eudora or another desktop client of your choosing.

Plasticmail includes spam filtering, virus scanning, WYSIWIG editing, spellchecking, a customizable interface, mail delivered to your desktop or webtop, and 35MB of mail storage. And more.

Just as important is what Plasticmail doesn't include: No pop-ups. No banners. No ads. No involuntary opt-in. No opt-out. No bait-and-switch - gettin' you in cheap, annoying the hell out of you, and then trying to upsell you on "extras." No undisclosed editing of email. No deleting all your saved messages overnight. No here today, gone tomorrow. No excuses.

Though the best part will always be having '@plastic.com' as your address.

   What others are saying about Plasticmail:

• "Wow!"
• "Looks gorgeous, works great."
• "Webmail looks fantastic...far better than my other email service."
• "Jebus, Plasticmail does everything."
• "I dig Plasticmail... was really sick of porno spam."
• "Man, Plasticmail is slick."
• "I use it. I adore it."
• "As a professional web app developer, I must commend the UI - it's very nice. Very nice indeed. +1 brilliant."
• "It's much better than the webmail client that ships with Exchange. I'll be transitioning over to Plastic."
• "Wicked cool."

Here's the pitch: Subscribe to Plasticmail at the standard rate - US$36 / 1 year - while I continue to add even more features. You'll be up and running with Plasticmail the next day, but your account will stay "off the clock" until Plasticmail emerges from beta. It's another small way for me to say thanks once and again, for believing.

q. What if I'd rather make a donation to keep Plastic running? (snail mail address updated 30 december 2004)
a. You're welcome to donate via Paypal or Amazon. If you could include your member name - along with some words of encouragement - in the 'message' box, I'd appreciate it. Make a secure donation via Paypal or donate courtesy the Amazon Honor System. For those who'd like some guidelines on how much to give, I'd just advise that you put a dollar value on how much that a month of Plastic is worth to you, and then multiply by 12... no amount is too small.

You'd rather write a check? Make it out to "Carl Steadman for Plastic" and mail it to Plastic, 1714 Franklin St. #100234, Oakland CA 94612. If you could, write your member name or email on the check, so that I can (eventually) send a thank you. (It seems I'm never prompt about these things - there's always something keeping me busy - but. I do remember.)

Also, since I've already been criticized for making the above links and address available - well, people asked, and that's what a FAQ's all about, isn't it? Plastic has received less than a dozen donations to date. So there. Yes, the whole business makes me every bit as uncomfortable as you. I'm working very hard to turn Plastic around. But. Better this, than your kind offers going without a proper response, in my inbox. From not knowing what to really say. Because Plastic could use a little help right now. But only to help get it to that point when it doesn't.

q. And all this is an elaborate joke on the part of whom? (added 28 april 2002)
a. I just work here, and any joke... well, you knew where that one was going, if you see what I mean. You're always welcome to drop an email to <carl@plastic.com> when things seem even more broken than usual or when you've come up with some brilliant new feature which I'd likely be working on right here now already, were I not halfway through the answer to a question that nobody's even asked...

q. What's the mailing address for Plastic? (updated 30 december 2004)
a. Plastic's address is 1714 Franklin St. #100234, Oakland CA 94612.

q. So what sort of sacrifice should I make at the altar of the Great Omnipotent Plastic Ruler Carl? (added 16 july 2002)
a. Carl babbles some nonsense about "creating a participatory media" every so often, and from time to time remembers he can "write," "edit," "code," and, as he puts it, "be my brilliant self." That said, his favorite answers seem to be "I don't know," "I didn't read that," "I don't consider that a useful metric," and "I'll add it to my list." Please, adjust your expectations accordingly. Also, he's older than you think, and doesn't really care what you say about him.

q. Is Plastic in compliance with the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act? (added 18 february 2005)
a. According to the Federal Trade Commission's "How to Comply With The Children's Online Privacy Protection Rule":

If you operate a commercial Web site or an online service directed to children under 13 that collects personal inf ormation from children or if you operate a general audience Web site and have actual knowledge that you are collecting personal information from children, you must comply with the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act.

q. What's a good introduction to the Lacanian analysis of popular culture? (added 13 july 2002)
a. For a fun, only slightly exasperating introduction to the study of popular culture using Lacanian theory, try Slavoj Zizek's Looking Awry: An Introduction to Jacques Lacan through Popular Culture.

q. Lacan makes my head hurt. (added 13 july 2002)
a. Dick Hebdige's Hiding In The Light is eminently more accessible than the above title, and doesn't mention anyone by the name of 'Jacques.' It includes essays on Vespa, Swatch, and Sid Vicious.

q. Where can I get a decent bagel? (added 17 july 2002)
a. H&H Bagels delivers worldwide.

q. What can you tell me about the "Fakes..." spam from Ryan and Jacob? (added 29 june 2002)
a. Their website is at eternalambition.com. More I cannot say.

q. Where can I find the cutest dog in the universe? (added 5 july 2002)
a. The cutest dog in the universe is found on MrWinkle.com.

q. I meant actual cute. (added 9 july 2002)
a. Try PandaDog.

q. Do you know of a good source for devil duckies? (added 5 july 2002)
a. A good source for devil duckies is Devil Duckies on PriceHot.com.

q. These cheap clown shoes are killing me. Makes you wonder whether child labor is all that good a value. Where can I get high-quality clown shoes, featuring the shoe-within-a-shoe? (added 14 july 2002)
a. Jolly Walkers, a family-run business, offers high-quality clown shoes at good prices.

q. Whatever became of Sarah Records? (added 3 august 2002)
a. The spirit of Sarah lives on, at Matt's new label, Shinkansen.

q. Tater? Tomater? (added 2 november 2002)
a. Instigator.

q. She wants to get married, but I'm not sure. (added 8 july 2002)
a. Buy a ring, propose. You now have another year to make up your mind.

q. He proposed, but he can be a bit of a jerk. (added 8 july 2002)
a. You already know the answer.